What I wish I knew to make it through layoffs
TL;DR: These are the five learnings about “surviving” layoffs based on my former experience in marketing and my current professional experience as a mental health counselor. 1. There’s the layoff, and then the aftereffects. 2. There will be an abundance of a scarcity mindset. 3. Community is vital. 4. Evaluate your professional needs. 5. Business is personal.
The inevitable
Even before I graduated from college, I had been warned that layoffs would be inevitable in my career. Mentors and guest speakers spoke of the importance of having six months worth of savings. They also shared their hard earned lessons of being laid off not equating to your worth, potential, and the their hopes for undoing the stigma those who are laid off can face. I’m grateful for their candid sharing of wisdom.
We didn’t talk about are the challenges those who aren’t laid off can also face. Think of the well intentioned comments of, “At least you still have a job” or, “at least you know where your next paycheck is coming from.” Those things are true, and also there are valid challenges for those who continue on at the company.
The truth is, just because you still have a job, doesn’t mean you didn’t experience something impactful or even traumatic. Layoffs, headcount reductions, and reorgs (the reorganization of departments and business structures) impact everyone, including those left at the organization to carry on. TechCrunch recently reported 60,000 job losses from 254 companies in this year so far. Layoffs cause a disruption in community, illicit memories of previous loss, bring economic uncertainty, and place additional strain on relationships.
Here are the things I wish I knew about being a “survivor” or one of those “lucky ones” who was able to maintain my position, using both my personal and second-hand experience as a counselor.
One: There’s the layoff, and then the aftereffects
After the brutal business of notifying those who lost their positions, the company will usually send an email or host a meeting notifying remaining employees of the actions taken, and sometimes reassurances are provided that with these “course corrections” and hard work from everyone there will not need to be further layoffs. There’s usually an afternoon to absorb what’s happened and perhaps unofficial good bye happy hours to collectively name the anger, sadness, and fear. Some describe it as a surreal experience, where your mind hasn’t quite caught up to what your body is processing.
Equally impactful, are the coming days and weeks when the remaining team members go about the business of picking up projects their former peers are no longer on. Personally, I remember huddling in conference rooms with peers as we became aware of the mountain of work we would be taking on in the coming weeks. Or identifying difficult conversations to have with clients about minimizing residual impacts to their business. Often I wanted to cry or get really angry, but I had to put that aside as the panic would slowly rise as my to-do list would.
There would come a point where we individually would realize the greater demands being placed on us at work would ripple into our personal lives and take a toll on our relationships and health. The stress wasn’t over just because we “made it” through the layoff. We would be asked to make sacrifices to protect the business and our continued employment. This can elicit new waves of anger, grief, or urges to numb pain. It’s important to have support and self-compassion throughout this period.
Two: There will be an abundance of a scarcity mindset
Following a layoff there will likely be an abundance of messages from the company inviting you to lean in, make sacrifices, and take on the company’s sense of urgency, and be grateful for maintaining employment. There may very well be truth to these scarcity or scarcity mindset (a perceived scarcity of resources) messages.
As Emily Boynton wrote in “4 Ways to Shed Scarcity Mindset and Increase Collaboration,” the focus from a scarcity mindset can serve to help employees focus on a project or task, but it can come at the expense of neglecting personal needs and other areas of life for the immediate gains. The work can be all encompassing and lead to making choices which aren’t aligned with personal values.
This focus can be beneficial for a time to the company’s profits, but the individuals who work there need support in maintaining their own health and access to resources. Practicing gratitude, cultivating an abundance mindset, going to therapy, and engaging in other supports can all be helpful. For those in helping professions, there is also a concept called compassion fatigue, where employees lose access to their superhero powers of compassion and empathy in order to cope with the demands of their job.
In counseling we assess the individual and systems (families, companies, communities, etc) someone operates within. A scarcity mindset, burnout and compassion fatigue are all symptoms of a larger systemic problem, and there are opportunities to disrupt the cycle. In more blunt terms, the system or company will often invite you to set yourself on fire to join them, but you don’t have to sacrifice yourself for the company. It can be a radical act of love to take care of yourself and your family by not joining in.
Three: Community is vital
There’s solidarity and healing in engaging with a broader community. By building connections and aspects of identity outside of work, someone builds and reinforces other aspects of who they are. Connections also help provide support and perspective. This could include partners, family, religious groups, or friends. If someone decides to leave their current job, having community in other places can also be helpful in making the transition easier.
When work becomes intense, it can be easy to fall into a trap of defining yourself by your output or productivity. I began taking weekend art and craft classes in the midst of cycles of layoffs. I’m grateful for being able to have something tangible outside of work to focus on. It was also refreshing to be around other people who had no idea what I did for a living, but we liked supporting each other in our artistic expression.
MeetUp can provide options for a wide range of cost and commitment levels. Some people enjoy starting with an athletic class, where there’s less pressure to talk, but they will continue to see similar faces. Game stores like Blue Highway Games and Mox Boarding House offer open gaming nights.
There is also the opportunity to stay connected with your peers who will go on to work elsewhere. By maintaining connection, there’s an opportunity to know other aspects and shared common interests outside of work. With time, you may also see they are flourishing after experiencing a layoff and could even work together again in the future.
Four: Evaluate your professional needs
We are continuously collecting data and assessing the situation for needs and goals for professional development. A layoff can bring changes to team structure, supervisors, organizational structures, as well as changes to individual responsibilities and career trajectory. Increased visibility and responsibility can be a way to demonstrate impact to a leadership, and there is a potential for a promotion or increase in compensation. There is so much potential for more change (although change isn’t always what we want or need at the time).
For those earlier in their career, organizational changes can also include being reorg’ed into a different department or discipline. In my marketing experience, this would often impact strategists, planners, project managers, account managers, and social media managers. Leadership doesn’t always consider the individual career growth implications, but these changes in responsibilities and title can impact these junior employee’s resume and hiring trajectory in the future. These are valid reasons to evaluate if the position is still appealing at the company. There can be opportunities in time for a transfer, outside skills development, or even deciding to leave the company for a next professional move.
Perhaps the reality is that someone need to be at an environment that’s more stable at this time. One of the impacts of burnout is an increased urge to take on greater responsibility. This can be tricky, because there’s truth that you are the glue that’s keeping the business or team together, but it doesn’t have to be that way. As you’ve recently experienced with layoffs, people are replaceable and business can be fickle. The out of proportion responsiblity can also take a negative toll on your health and life. Taking time off or resigning can feel like a betrayal, but in some cases, it can actually be the start to something much better for you and those around you.
Five: Business is personal
More senior members of an organization can face their own challenges. They can experience complicated emotions as decision makers for who will be impacted by the layoffs. They have the responsibility to maintain the company narrative regarding decisions to junior members, even if their own thoughts and feelings conflict. They also likely have more lived experience with layoffs in the past. It would be neglectful to not recognize that there is a personal toll making “business decisions” can take on all employees. These factors and more result in the truth that business decisions are personal and have personal impacts, especially when we consider full time workers spend 2,080 hours a year working.
The BBC recently reported on agesim Gen X can face in the workplace. The pressures to perform, budget fears, and unfair perceptions are all concerns. This can be compounded for women in tech workplaces, as Slate reported. These stats are sobering for those who are laid off, as well as those who fear their own prospects if they are laid off. It will take systemic changes to shift this discrimination, and it is painfully personal for those who have been wronged. We can name and tend to these struggles, as well as those faced by the people who were laid off.
Closing thoughts
The truth is no layoffs are the same, and how you will react or process a layoff can be different. Layoffs suck for everyone. I’m sorry if you have been impacted in any capacity by a layoff. I offer much care and comfort for challenging times. If you’d like to contact me, I can be reached at Kelly@KellyHemphillCounseling.com.
